The Longest Journey...

Since last we left the chaps known as Chris and Derek, they had agreed that it would be best to hitch-hike a ride far far away from the villain known as Zak.
Eyes wide with excitement and tongues moist with a taste for adventure, the two stuck out their thumbs and with a little luck had hitched a ride with a burly mustached man.


Hours, and miles, later the burly mustached driver, with soul as kind as a baby lamb, announced it was "the end of the road" for our quasi-heroes. Bursting with excitement, the two leapt from the vehicle, shaking with anticipation of the adventures to come...

CHAPTER 2:
A Magical Land
-------------------


A brightly painted sign advertising promises of fun, as well as sun, lured forth the two adventurers.


Before their eyes laid the most magical and beautiful land they had ever seen.


Derek turned to Chris and exclaimed, "What a glorrrrrrrious place!"


The two basked in their change of good fortune.

'cue music of impending doom'


Alas, their freedom was short-lived. Twas only a matter of time before the evil villain Zak had caught up with them. This time with his bantam minion at hand.


"What are you two fucks doing!" he roared, his minion cackling with laughter beside him. "Sorry you big gays, but the party's over!"


And in the blink of an eye, the two young bucks (Chris and Derek) were sulkily unloading more trucks for the no-good Zak.

The party was indeed over.


After countless hours of tedious labor sir Chris heard a 'whoosh!'
With a raise to his eyebrow he ejaculated, "What's that over yonder!?" pointing to a peculiar object flying through mid-air.


A wonderously delightful pygmy elephant was swooping through the sky, with what appeared to be an outlandish little rodent commuting on it's head.
As the miniature pachyderm landed, the mouse-like creature hopped off of the noggin on which he rode, and with the utmost sudden- disappeared into a burst of light!


Right before Chris' and Derek's eyes the rodent had shape-shifted into a much more human-like animal...his ears of freakish proportions.
"Heyyyy gyyuys!" he sputtered (with what appeared to be an over-active salavation gland), "I knyyyow of a syyuper syyecryet place-sshhhh where yyyyyou can gyyyo to gyyyyeet awayyy fryom Zyyyak AYYYND eat cyyyyupcakes!"
The two stared at him is disbelieve...then decidedly in absolute believe, for who could ever lie about cupcakes.
"Alllllllsss yyyou hyyave to dyooo iyyysssss pyaaass thryyough the yand of giantsssss, braaaave thryyyough thyaaa culdesac offff phyyantoms ayyand navigyyyate the pyyath of mirrorssss!"
Before they could inquire for further details, the mysterious rodent-man shrank back to his original size and soared away on the marvelous flying elephant. Chris and Derek stared at each other- it was business time.

Freed from the shackles of the evil Zak, the two eagerly trounced their way down the path whom the rodent-man said would take them to the land of giants. Distracted by thoughts of sweets and sparkling water, the two had unawaringly stumbled into a hamlet of giants...


For a moment the lives of Chris and Derek seemed assuredly done for, for giants the size of ladders had taken notice to the unwelcome visitors.


Yet to their surprise the titans seemed preoccupied by other matters. Their leader, mastadonic in size, was growling orders to them- none of which indicated any notice of the travelers.
So they simply adventured forward.

Eventually they came upon a culdesac, marked with a perculiar sign indicating that it was some sort of area in which smoke was allowed.


"Yo Chris!" Derek shouted, "Smoke this!"


"Smoke what?" came a very familiar voice.
"Brook!" both Chris and Derek yelped in unison, "We thought you were dead!"
"I am dead!" grinned Brook.
"Your a...g-g-g-g-g-ghooooost!?!" they stammered, eyes bulging from their heads.
"Yeah. Zak, the most evil guy in the world, killed me. This sign was supposed to say 'Ghosting Area' but the printers screwed up."


"But worry not," said Brook, "I'm a ghost of friendly nature!"


"Aw gosh Brook! We missed you so much, now you can come with us to the land of infinite cupcakes!"


"Wait right there!" a giant rodent-human appeared out of nowhere (this one more rotund than the last) "You are forever bound to the 'Ghosting Area' Brook and therefore cannot go to the land of infinite cupcakes."
Sad faces were exchanged.
"As for you Chris and Derek," he bantered on, "You must move forward, for the evil Zak is gaining close behind you!"

And thus, the two skinny pale men vetured forward.

As the day moved forward, the sun grew hotter and the air seemed dryer. Mirages were starting to form while vultures circled overhead. The fate of the two vagabonds was starting to look grim.


It was at this point that Derek surveyed a familiar face in the distance...


...but he couldn't quite put his finger on who.


But of course! It was a mirror image of himself! A doppelganger!

This was the last obstacle the flying vole had mentioned they would come across. The cupcakes must be dangerouslyyyyy close.
And then, there was a noise.


"Dannnnnnnng!" slurred Chris, looking off in the direction of the cupcakes.


Slowly heading towards them was what seemed to be a parade of half-retarded adolescents.

Without a moments hesitation the two joined in.


With merrymaking...


...and sweets...


...this, was quite possibly, the most mirth the two had ever seen.


So they waggishly frolicked about into the night.


But as the evening sky darkened, so did the spirit in the land of festivity. For Zak was close at hand.


Sensing this amongst the fanfare, Derek turned to Chris and murmered, "Sir. I think it would be wise to motivate onwards. I sense wicked-ness approaching."


"I concur sir. Perhaps these ducks could help hasten our 'flight'!"
The two chuckled, having soft spots for puns.

And with that (and the help of the fowl) the two flew into the night. In search of cupcakes.